Starring:
Eddie "The Homewrecker" Fitzgerald as Elmer!
Nico "Really Tall" Colaleo as Husband!
Kali "Snaggletooth" Fontecchio as Kaaali!
and Brian the picture-taker.
A secret rendezvous of starry-eyed lovers! The daring minxish Kaaali has been sneaking out from under her Husband's radar to meet her passionate lover, Elmer.
Quiver! Sigh! Pant! Ooze!
"You know Elmer, I'm a married woman, living in sin......under Jesus!
"Husband? Pfffffttt!!!! Like I care! You're MINE now!"
"Well, I don't know how I'm going to escape, I only have like three pairs of undies. I could just not wear any, I guess..."
"YUCK! Kaaali, don't make me vomit, you could get so many diseases not wearing underwear you kno-"
"Elmer! Pipe down!!! I-I-I th-think my Husband is watching us!"
***STARE***
"Could that really be my Lil' Pumpkin Button? My Lil' Tootsey Wootsey???!!!"
"Elmer!!!!!! He's coming this way!!! QUICK! Hide!!!"
"HAW, HAW, HAW!! Yeah right! Tryin' to shake me up, eh? I'll shake you up! HAW, HAW, HAW!!!"
***STTTTEEEEEAAAAAMMMMMMM***
"Ehhhhhh!!! Don't look, don't look! Turn around!!!"
"Hwwwwaaaa???"
"Oh no! He's recognized me!!! WE'RE DOOMED!!"
PANIC
"Hummanah, hummanah, hummmanah..."
"EXCUSE ME, BUT WHO MIGHT YOU BE?"
"Oh Honeybunches of Oats, Elmer is just a friend, I swear! Please don't kill him!!!"
"YOU LIKE THAT DRINK, EEEELLLMMMMEEERRR??!"
"Uh...oh, well yeah, sure! I love Diet Coke!"
***CRUSH***
"EEEEEEPPPP!!!"
"Now you come here, you harlot, I'm going to teach you not to leave the house unless I write you a permission slip!!"
"HOW COULD YOU HAVE BETRAYED MY TRUST?!! DO YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL? MY BRAIN IS ON FIRE!!!"
"Now smile for your Hunny Bunny, don't you look away now! This is going to hurt you a lot more than it's going to hurt me!!"
**SM-UHHHHHH-
AAACK***
"Oooooh, I just can't sit down and let you beat the woman of my wet dreams!!!"
"HOW'S THE WEATHER DOWN THERE, BUB?"
"Uh-ba-ba-uh...quite nice actually! (Gosh, he's even uglier up close!)"
"You know, now that I think about it, you two do make a lovely couple. Don't fix a good thing if it ain't broke, my pastor always told me."
***pat, pat, pat***
SOB
"Well, see ya later! Have a nice life together!"
"BYEBYE!"
"Could you squeeze me tighter? Maybe I'll choke and die, and then the pain will go away."
"No Honey, we're going to live happily ever after, PERIOD."
***SINGING***
"I want to be a cowboy's sweeeeetheart, I want to rope and riiiiide all daaaay......."
THE END/ASS CAMEO
Nico and Brian witnessed CARTOONISTS theorizing after eating Carney Hotdogs...
"Sometimes I wander Eddie, does anyone really read our blogs? Is there a Heaven? If so, is Bertrand Russel reading this very sentence as I'm typing it? And what's the meaning of life?"
"All good questions, Kali. I think that one day it'll all make sense. But if I were to take a stab in the dark, I'd say Atomic-Super Zombies will be involved somehow."
DJ Eddie Kool Aids and his Cityslickers will be dropping his album this Christmas! Peace-out, Son!
28 comments:
HAW HAW HAW!
DJ EDDIE KOOL AIDS IN THE HIZZY
before all of Kali's fans start writing Nico Hate Letters, you must know that THIS IS ALL PRETEND.
kali and i are actually the best of friends in real life! I would never EVER slap her. THAT hard, anyway.
BITCHES AND HOES
DON'T KNOOOOW
!!!!!!!BEST STORY EVER!!!!!!! A+++
P.S.
mmmm, marlo butt
Anytime you feature Marlo's ass - it's fine by me. That girl has got a tasty hinder!
You guys look like you're having a great time. I wish I could be a part of it (other than viewing pictures online like some pasty stalker).
HawHawHawHawHawHawHaw!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
What writers strike? Call the networks ! Great work gang. The" Eddie Fitzgerald show" has always been one of my favorites.
I <3 the Ass Cameo
Ze
Hilarious post!
(And Uncle Eddie's too!)
All that's missing is the "Why I Oughtta...." moment.
Excellent! Will Eddie ever get the girl?
The soda gag had me rolling on the floor! These are always fun.
-David O,
blood! >:o
"blood! >:o"
HUH?
Perfect ending.
very funny!!! why not videotape scenes and pop them up on youtube??
Guru: Where are the stranglers?
[thugs respond in Hindi]
Guru: Give them their strangling cloths.
Thugs: Kali.
Guru: Give them their burial picks.
Thugs: Kali.
Guru: Swear by our mother Kali to be thrice faithful to her and to me and to our order and to all of us.
[thugs pray in Hindi]
Guru: Rise, our new-made brothers. Rise and kill. Kill, lest you be killed yourselves. Kill for the love of killing. Kill for the love of Kali. Kill! Kill! Kill!
Gunga Din (1939)
That was great! I love your photo stories. Live action cartoons :)
Pappy D's just quoted one of absolute favorite pieces of dialogue EVER! If you only knew how much mileage I've got out of "KILL for the Love of KILLING!"
from "Gunga Din",especially when playing with my dogs & cats...whee!
Also I love your coat. : )
Jenny: Explain this thing you and Pappy D are talking about, I don't quite get it.
"blood! >:o"
"HUH?"
...you better think twice before you flash your headlights dawg.
word
OH, OF COURSE! Hahahaha- nice photo comparison!
I'LL THINK TWICE NEXT TIME, I PROMISE.
I love when cartoonist are the cartoons....so you are my favorites cartoons, I think!!!
Hey Kali--the dialogue is from "Gunga Din"-1939, Cary Grant, George Stevens directed. A GREAT film, by any & all standards, truly! Very funny and once you see it there's a heck of lot of stuff in there since stolen for other films.
Ask Fontanelli(he'd better back me up)!
Anyway, there's a lot of guys screming "KALI!" in there, most notably the great sequence Pappy posted. You've never seen such gleeful bloodthirstiness as in the face of that guy who plays the Thuggee boss.
if you could tranlate this in spanish, this owuld be multimillionare soap opera material in mexico! ahahahah or better yet, lifetime! he might end up as the abusive husband who in the end builds the wife's character. then he gets major onage implanted on his ass. wow.. i love the photos. i want to do things like this, but i'm stilla cali virgin, or a newfag (in some blogs).
kudos to ya'll!
Did you improvise the story line?
Your talent has a dynamic theatrical chemistry. What about dialog and thought balloons.
If you want to really entertain everyone , hows about a comic book photos hoot where you draw props and then magically bring them to life and wear them.
Nico in the stovepipe top hat with the six foot stop watch slowing down time and stopping traffic.
I didn't mean to come off creepy, just affirmative.
You go, girl!
Yes!!!(pumps fist in air)
quality. speech bubbles would rule. luckily kali is much cuter than the Hindu goddess:
"Out of the surface of her forehead, fierce with frown, issued suddenly Kali of terrible countenance, armed with a sword and noose. Bearing the strange khatvanga, decorated with a garland of skulls, clad in a tiger’s skin, very appalling owing to her emaciated flesh, with gaping mouth, fearful with her tongue lolling out, having deep reddish eyes, filling the regions of the sky with her roars, falling upon impetuously and slaughtering the great asuras in that army, she devoured those hordes of the foes of the devas..."
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kali
Hey Kali,
To see your adventures with Eddie again and again on it's own new blog would be really cool; like a series. cool stuff
This is hilarious!!
Great and super entertaining sequence!!
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